Tuesday 7/01/2008 12:32:00 AM

The quantum of her frown. The mechanics of her stare. Dimensions discovered. Time travel in the purest sense. We go back. We remain here. Stretched between the world we exist in and the one we remember once lived in us.

I don't have a shadow where I am. Just men masquerading as equations. Plus. Minus. Exponents. There is no light from above to mark my stand. But I know I am standing here. Not looking back.

The volume of his loneliness is calculated in simple terms. Multiply the man by the women. Determine if he has had enough of them.

Extraneous vaginae make him masculine. Finding the one he wants makes him a man.

It's hard to say what I want. Other than nothing. The sweep of flesh into the volatile Chambers of careless touch. The buck of angry hours as we try to ride them into narrow slits of future. The saddles on their backs thick between the moments we try to pair.

The reins we grasp a trivial component of a greater chaos. I could be your future. And your past. But anything else is just the loneliness demanding a fair percentage.

What I lose. What I've lost to them. Comes back. In dead flies to empty from the lamp. Changed the bulb or live in the dark. I can't decide. What I want to do.

What I could want. Anything I could expect. I know who you are. I won't dare to wait for you to be someone else.

I wouldn't try to dissolve the layers of time between us. But I sometimes think its closer than I had anticipated.

Fools and women try to reconcile the math of absent men.

Close enough.

Or too close still.

It's hard to know.

Not bending down. Trying to pick up. The shadows.

Is dark enough.

3 comments:
Kris said...

just wanted to tell you i hit unsubscribe in my reader 30 seconds ago...if you ever switch to full feeds, please drop a comment on my blog and i'll come back...i promise :)

forgetmenow said...

your writing always leaves me speechless ... this astounding piece has done it again. how could i offer words like awesome and genius ... they seem kind of irrelevant in the face of such ...brilliance ...

and how sycophantic does that sound? lol

absolutely amazing nonetheless ...

ap said...

kris, i'm sorry to repot i can't publish a full feed. it's difficult enough to prorect my musing as it is. sorry to lose you, but if that is how little it means, not much of a loss.

forgetmenow: you elevate me higher than i deserve. The words are just spit. In what shape it should land is for each reader to determine. The lips from which they fall makes little, if any, difference.



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