Monday 11/07/2005 10:56:00 PM

Certain things in life there are no escaping. Literally. Become an alcoholic and you'll always be one. You can choose to be the recovering kind or the not so recovered, but either way, underneath the will power or lack thereof, you're still an alcoholic.

You're always a mother. No matter how old your children grow or even if they die. You'll always be bipolar no matter how regularly you take your lithium.

There are qualities about ourselves we can change. Hair, weight, clothes, even eye color. We can change the superficial. But we can't ever change what really matters.

All that we can do is force ourselves by chemical means or through will power to behave as if we aren't what we actually are.

You wouldn't think anyone can be born an alcoholic or a drug addict, but if they can be born biploar or clinically depressed or inherently poetic, isn't that the same thing. Fill them full of whatever drug you like, they'll still be dependent upon something outside themselves to make life something they can swallow without vomitting it back up again.

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